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Takmer dospelé poviedky od Zuzany Štelbaskej

Napísal Milan Buno, literárny publicista 04. marec 2018

Zuzana Štelbaská stále pracuje ako televízna dramaturgička, má veľké skúsenosti z médií, no čoraz viac sa prejavuje aj ako autorka knižiek pre deti a mladých. A darí sa jej. Ako tvrdí, príbeh, ktorý sa jej zrodí v hlave sa musí v nej aj udržať, postavy ju musia opantať. 

. „Každým príbehom žijem dlho pred tým, než sa dostane na papier,“ tvrdí Zuzka.
Výborne to potvrdzujú aj nové Takmer dospelé poviedky, ktoré pekne ilustrovala Ivana Šáteková.

Láska a zamilovanosť by mali byť romantické, ale v skutočnosti ich otrieskali o steny a chodníky.
Hrdinovia tesne pred dospelosťou zažívajú svoje trápne, tragikomické a mysteriózne zážitky prvých vzťahov, pozorovaní dvoma pouličnými mačkami. Naivná mačka Ginevra a cynický kocúr Lancelot rozprávajú príbehy Maríny Ohromnej a ďalších drzo, bez obalu a nedávajú si servítky pred ústa. Aký experiment s láskou čaká na teba?

Ako prezrádza Zuzana Štelbaská, nemá rada prílišné romanticko-nostalgické spomínanie, aké to bolo, keď sme my boli mladí. Aj súčasní tínedžeri prechádzajú všetkým možným. Len inak. Je jedno, či prvý bozk zažijú pod panelákom na prakeri, alebo pri obchodnom centre. „V tom momente aj tak pre vás neexistuje celý svet, ale len tá jedna chvíľa, jeden človek, jeden moment. To si jednoducho zapamätáte,“ dodáva autorka novinky Takmer dospelé poviedky.

Zuzana Štelbaská je autorkou kníh pre deti a mládež. Od pätnástich rokov pôsobí v médiách, vytvorila stovky magazínov, získala niekoľko novinárskych cien. Okrem mnohých stála za detskými a tínedžerskými programami ako Fidlibum, Fidlibumove rozprávky, Si v obraze? No problem, The New Teenage Europe… Dnes pôsobí ako šéfdramatugička magazínu Reflex v TV Markíza.

Prečítajte si úryvok z novinky Takmer dospelé poviedky:

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Ráno čakala netrpezlivá Ginevra pri Maríninom balkóne. Marína rozospato odhrnula záclonu a Ginevra okamžite začala nakúkať do izby. Nikoho okrem Maríny v nej nevidela.
„Tak asi predsa len prišla včera sama domov,“ zamraučala.
„Nemrauči. Musíš počkať na Lancelota,“ povedala cez okno Marína mačke a zase nechala záclonu padnúť dolu. Ginevra stratila výhľad aj záujem. Lancelot nepríde skôr ako o hodinu. Rozhodla sa teda ísť pozrieť do vedľajšieho bytu, v ktorom bývala rodina s dvoma deťmi.
Preskočila z Maríninho balkóna na jedľu, vydriapala sa na pevný konár a cupkala až na jeho samý kraj. Ihličie ju bezpečne doviedlo na parapet okna detskej izby Šimona a Vandy Lopčíkovcov.
Šimon Lopčík práve vstával. Sedel na posteli a šúchal si oboma rukami líca. Mal päť rokov a chystal sa do škôlky. Ginevra ho nemala rada. Strašil ju. Dupal na ňu a rehotal sa, keď od neho splašene bežala preč.
Zato jeho sestra bola omnoho zaujímavejšia. Šestnásťročná Vanda Lopčíková chodila prvý rok na poštové učilište. Nie že by chcela byť poštárkou, ale vedela, čím nechcela byť – pekárkou ako jej mama, šoférom ako jej otec. Iná vhodná škola pre ňu v okolí nebola, tak chodila tam.
Nemala ešte ani riadne rozlepené oči, keď sa natiahla po mobile na nočnom stolíku. Nechcela kontrolovať čas. Po odblokovaní sa jej okamžite otvoril Facebook. Nikdy ho nezatvárala. Iba v akútnych prípadoch, keď potrebovala volať mame, či má kúpiť chlieb alebo rožky. Hoci bola jej mama pekárka, poslúchala rady svojho obľúbeného ženského časopisu, kde sa jasne písalo, že práca sa nemá nosiť domov!
Vanda Lopčíková bola od Facebooku chorobne závislá. Nedokázala žiť s vedomím, že nevie, čo sa na Facebooku deje. Nedokázala žiť s tým, že by jej niečo v tomto paralelnom živote uniklo. Nie že by sa v jej skutočnom živote nič nedialo, ale nedialo sa nič také, čo by Vandu akokoľvek zaujímalo. Bola posledná z triedy, kto od rodičov dostal smartfón, a keď prišla na strednú, bolo jej hneď jasné, ako veľmi sa toto omeškanie podpíše na jej šťastí. Všetci riešili svoj život na Facebooku. Všetkým časové osi prekypovali aktivitou. Všetci niečo zdieľali.
šetci všetko lajkovali. A po lajknutí všetkých správnych vecí ich potom všetci riešili v triede. Vanda pochopila, že o tomto je život. Pochopila, že aby aj ona mohla byť šťastná a začať plnohodnotne žiť, lajkov musí rozdať oveľa viac, než doteraz stíhala. Preto svoj telefón za žiadnych okolností nepúšťala z ruky. Vanda Lopčíková však nemohla tušiť, že ešte v ten deň ju telefónu zbavia tajomné pokrivené čiary pochádzajúce od jej spolužiaka. Nemala odkiaľ vedieť, že úzkosť, ktorú v toto nervózne ráno prežívala pri pohľade na svoju časovú os, už čoskoro vymení za lúštenie nezmyselných čiernych čiar, ktoré ju možno dokonca urobia... šťastnou.
Prv než sa to všetko stalo, siahla Vanda po mobile, otvorila Facebook a pozerala sa na svoju časovú os. Jasne si pamätala, že posledný včerajší príspevok (skontrolovaný o 01.48) bol zo stránky Obleč sa! Ukazoval, ako sa majú ženy na druhý deň obliecť a kde si to kúpia. Teraz jej tam svietil odkaz dvojhviezdičkového penziónu Víťaz z Dobšinej, ktorý ponúkal víkendovú zľavu. Rolovala nižšie. Levy zo stránky Animal Friends. Mačky zo stránky Ľúbime mačky. Psy zo stránky Ľúbime psy. Kôň zo stránky Ľúbime kone, bože, to tí ľudia v noci nespia, ale ľúbia kone – mačky – psy?! A potom odkaz zo stránky Obleč sa!
Klikla na ikonku Priatelia. Dala refresh. Žiadna nová žiadosť. Potom refresh ešte raz. Pre istotu. Nič. Pozrela sa na počet svojich priateľov. 30. Už týždeň rovnako trápnych 30. Všetko jej spolužiaci, pár kamošiek z bloku a teta.
Na jej časovej osi sa toho dialo žalostne málo. To nikto nič nerobí? Nezdieľa? Nerieši?
Dala refresh. Na časovej osi sa jej objavila pozvánka na stránku Black Cat Café. Kaviareň bola v meste, o ktorom si Vanda ani nebola celkom istá, kde je. Like.
Objavila sa jej pozvánka na stránku Filmový festival European Films in the East. Like.
Objavila sa jej pozvánka na stránku Seniori. Like.
Objavila sa jej pozvánka na stránku Teenage fun. Like.
Objavila sa jej pozvánka na stránku Hemoroidy. Like.
Objavila sa mama.
„Vanda, poď už. O desať minút odchádzame.“
Nahrbená Vanda neodtŕhala oči od telefónu. Po pamäti vošla do kúpeľne.
National Geografic. Like. Voľnou rukou si umyla zuby. Pľuvla trochu pasty na displej. Utrela ho do gatiek.
Megadeath. Like.
Kikuška Zlatuliq Nováková poslala fotku seba, ako stojí pred zrkadlom v kúpeľni len v tieločku. Neučesané vlasy jej zakrývali prsia. Like.
Vanda sa na seba do zrkadla nikdy nepozerala. Načo aj. Svoj špicatý nos nenávidela. Voľnou rukou si ho trikrát silnejšie pohladila. Aby tú špicatosť trochu obrúsila. Zatiaľ to nepomohlo.
Kikuška Zlatuliq Nováková na fotke označila svojho frajera Mima Mimoňuška. Vandu striaslo. Zmenila názor a dala Unlike. Ale zase, keď sa chcela s Kikuškou Zlatuliq Novákovou kamarátiť...
Like.
Ale čo. Veď Kikuška už má frajera.
Unlike.
Vanda si voľnou rukou opláchla oči. Frkla trochu vody na displej. Utrela ho do gatiek.
Objavil sa sponzorovaný link na Inštitút sociálnej práce. Like.
Vrátila sa späť k fotke. Bol na nej jeden Like. Od Vandinej naj spolužiačky Dominiqy Šišiny Kráľovej. Vanda stisla pery a dala Like.
„Vanda! Odchádzame!“
Vanda prepchala telefón cez úzky rukáv na roláku. Jednou rukou si natiahla rifle, ktoré chcela dať už včera mame do prania, lebo boli od omáčky (ktorá jej na ne kvicla na obede, keď sa jej na časovej osi objavila pozvánka na stránku Vtip na každý deň a dala jej Like). Schmatla tašku so včerajšími učebnicami.
V aute prebehla časovú os. Pribudol komentár od Mima Mimoňuška pod fotkou Kikušky Zlatuliq Novákovej: „:-*“
Dominiqa Šišina Kráľová dala komentáru Like.
Vandu išlo roztrhnúť od jedu! Dominiqa Šišina Kráľová Kikuške Zlatuliq Novákovej všetko lajkovala. Ale žeby dala aspoň jeden Like aj Vande, to nie! Nelajkla jej ani fotku s jej tetou, šéfredaktorkou mestských novín. Vanda klikla na jej profil. Lucia Zinková. 657 priateľov. 657! O 13 viac ako pred týždňom! 13!!! Rolovala po jej časovej osi. Fotka z recepcie hotela Triple Bed. Like. Pozvánka na tlačovku ku koncertu Lucie Bílej. Like. Linky na články. Like. Like. Like. Odkazy od kamošov. To preskočila. Lucia Zinková sa práve spriatelila s Petrou Polnišovou. Vande skoro oči vypadli! Like.
„Vanda, si hluchá? Vystúp!“
Pred školou hlúčik poďobaných štvrtákov fajčil lacné cigy. Vanda prebehla okolo. Jednou rukou sa prezula. Na časovej osi sa objavila fotka z ich triedy. Bola na nej Dominiqa Šišina Kráľová v objatí s Kikuškou Zlatuliq Novákovou. Like.
Počkať!
Komentár fotky bol: „:-*“.
UNLIKE! Kravy!
So sklonenou hlavou a mobilom v ruke kráčala do triedy. Bola si istá, že tam bude nuda. Včera sa na časovej osi nedialo nič, len kone – mačky – psy. Určite nebude o čom. Určite sa nebude nikto s nikým baviť. Veď nebude o čom. Určite.
Tak určiteeeeeeee. Like.
Vanda Lopčíková sedela v predposlednej lavici. Všetci jej spolužiaci boli napchatí pri katedre a riešili včerajší Facebook. Rehooot! Ohováračky. Muzika. Video. Bulvárky. Showky. A toto ste videli? A hento ste počuli? Počkaj, toto ti pošlem! Tamtú haluz musíš vidieť!
Do Vandy vošla zlosť.
Zazvonilo.
Na prvej hodine nejaký učiteľ niečo hovoril.
Vanda zúrivo rolovala časovú os. Kde to všetko bolo?? Kam sa stratili všetky haluze, super veci a rehoty z jej časovej osi??? O čom to všetci točili???
Vandin ukazovák švihal po displeji. Ako atlét vo vrcholnej forme chcel dohnať Vandiných spolužiakov, ktorí tam kdesi spolu žili. Bez nej! Zatiaľ.
Vanda si dala telefón ešte bližšie k hlave a hľadala. Hľadala svoj budúci život ako o život. 

1 Komentár

  • Komentár www.talad999.com %PM, %14 %672 %2025 %15:%mar napísal www.talad999.com

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